Assuming you read the about page, you at least have a general idea what this blog is all about. In case you didn’t go there yet, well, I strongly encourage you to click this. So now that you all know what I’m trying to do here, you’re probably asking yourself a few questions, such as:
- Why should I spend my time reading what will undoubtedly be a long ramble about music I don’t care about?
- Isn’t this guy going to just be biased? This is a blog! There’s no way I can trust his fanboy reviews!
- What took me to this small, dark corner of the internet, and why haven’t I gotten out of this chair and gone to bed/made a sandwich/finished my TPS report?
Well, I think that last question is one that I can’t answer. But, I’ll do my best to cover the first two. First, yes it will most likely be a long ramble. I will try to curtail the length of my posts, but my thoughts don’t respond well to attempts at cosmetic improvement. As for music you don’t care about, give it a try! That’s the whole point of this blog. There will undoubtedly be bands you have heard of, but for the ones you haven’t you should at least check out a song or two. I promise I have good taste.
That brings me to the second point. Am I going to be biased? Certainly. But so is every other reviewer out there. The best you can do is find a reviewer whose taste is similar to your own, or who treats his subject in a manner you can appreciate. While I can’t claim to be unbiased, that isn’t necessarily the point of this exercise. Since I’m writing about things I like, I’m not going to highlight all the negative things about each album. The point is to share things I think are good, and explain why.
So now that I’ve assuaged your fears, you’re probably wondering what my biases actually are. I’ll attempt to compile them in the following lists.
Things I like:
- Mood. This most often comes from the production and provides an overall “feel” for music. If you think a song sounds “spooky” or “intense,” you’re describing the mood. Music without a solid mood tends to be unfocused and falls short of the greatness mark.
- Minor keys. I don’t know why, I just like them. It’s hard for a song in a minor key to get twee and cloying. Plus I like how you can use the same 3 frets to play a natural minor scale on the guitar.
- Complexity. This one can be a double edged sword. I place a high value on music that does something new, and playing more than four chords is a huge part of that. Unfortunately, excessive complexity can muddy your music and make it enjoyable for only those who like figuring out what you were thinking when you wrote it. Provided it isn’t taken too far, complexity is very important.
- Ska. Say what you will about horns and suits, ska was my first love. Ska and its derivatives can also be mixed with other genres for maximum enjoyment. Plus, go listen to some first wave ska/reggae drums.
- Ambient music. This has a huge influence on mood. Like ska, ambient elements can be added to other genres. While it sounds simple, to make a memorable song using more textures than melodies is actually pretty difficult.
Things I don’t like:
- Banjo, ukelele, and excessive vocal reverb in indie music. Hiding your vocals is usually a bad idea, unless you can’t hold a tune. Plus, too much reverb makes your voice sound cold and distant. Also, don’t use an instrument like a guitar if it’s not a guitar. If you aren’t proficient in the banjo or ukelele it makes you sound less skilled.
- Regina Spektor imitation. Why does everyone need to sing like Regina Spektor? I don’t know. Stop it.
- The 80s. The age of synth pop. Everything went digital, but it wasn’t ready yet. Too many cold tones and harsh colors makes your music sound dead. It works in some cases, but not many.
- The last 30 years of pop music. Obviously this one has exceptions. Pop music has a tendency to simplify and cater to the largest group of people. This leads to bland songs and a lack of depth. Science has my back on this one.
- Excessive happiness. This has huge ties to pop music. The world is not happy all the time and it works better when your music reflects that. When you hear a song that sounds happy beyond belief (think saccharine and schmaltzy), it is either at least 50 years old (which is acceptable, given the cultural setting) or someone is trying to sell you something.
So there you have it. My biases are on the table for you to keep in mind while you read my thoughts on the best music I’ve found during my college days. I hope you’re looking forward to this journey as much as I am.
The Embattled Spatula 
